I've been watching a lot of the CNN nonstop coverage of Hurricane Katrina that is currently devistating New Orleans. I normally don't watch the news but when there are 'big' stories my mom leaves the TV on one of the news channels all day and I can't help but become interested. I mean, they show the same clips over and over but for some reason I just sit and stare at the TV waiting for something to happen. But that is beside the point.
There is also currently in our society a debate about Darwinism and Intelligent Design. What should be taught? What is really a theory? Is Intelligent Design just relgion (Christianity, to be specific) in disguise sneaking its way into our schools? I don't know the answers to these questions(although I have some ideas that I won't share with you), but I'm more concerned with our pursute of truth--Truth.
Is it all just chance--this planet, this solar system, this galaxy, this universe? Did it all come together through 'randomness' and the laws of physics? If so, Katrina makes sense in this system of non-sense. If there really was a designer he or she didn't do a good job apparently because bad things are STILL happening to good people, innocent people are dying because they lived in the wrong place, people are losing their homes because the randomness of creation--if you can still call it that--that is being revealed to us in the form of a category 5 hurricane. If there is no designer--let's just call him God for ease--If there is no God, then I can be OK with this hurricane. I can say, 'yes, this is just the way things are,' and go back to my own life of randomness and hope that it doesn't happen to me.
What is the alternative? A pseudo-intelligent designer? Deism? Pantheism? As a Christian, I hold to the idea that God is the Creator of the world, separate and distinct from His creation (not pantheism), yet closer to it than is knowable. He is not a far away God that flipped a coin or made a clock (not Deism). He is the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. The God of Moses and the Prophets. He is the God who makes his climactic revelation throught Jesus. What does this tell us about the Judeo-Christian God and how he works? That he is close to us and suffers with us, that he does not stand above us and say, "DO WHAT I WANT OR ELSE", that he cares about his children. So what about hurricanes? Couldn't he have stopped it? Maybe that is the wrong question. If we ask this question we aren't taking into account the Fall. Not just the Fall of Man, but the Fall of everything. This allows me to say, "No, this isn't right. Things aren't the way they are supposed to be."
I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God. Romans 8:18-21
When the storm is over what are we to do? Not just this hurricane, but all the other storms in our lives that remind us of how things just don't seem right. Do we appeal to randomness like most of our commercialized and secularized society? Or do we appeal to a God that is both the Creator and the Sufferer? How do we look for Heaven on Earth in the midst of Hell?
The rain ceases, and a bird's clear song suddenly announces the difference between Heaven and Hell.
- Thomas Merton
It won't come through a textbook. We won't see it through Darwinism or Intelligent design. We must seek the Truth in the midst and aftermath of death and suffering. The peace of God that is indescribable with words or thought, that can only be revealed to us through the song of a bird proclaiming hope will be our answer. But we must look for it--always--and never cease. When the storm is over, we must listen for the Word of God. Maybe it takes a storm to silence us, to put away the things of the world that seem to consume us (although we think we are consuming them), and put us in a position to hear God.
The story of Elijah may help us here.
The LORD said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by."
Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.
Then a voice said to him, "What are you doing here, Elijah?
It is the gentle whisper of God that will be our salvation. Pray that we can hear it.
Monday, August 29, 2005
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Longing
"One summer day after another broke with a cool effulgence...and there was a breath of widening life in the morning air, something hard to describe - an oxygen intoxicant...some odor, some feeling so hopelessly promising that I would fall back in my bed on guard against it....I wanted to break out crying from stabs of hopeless joy, or intolerable promise, or because those mornings were too full of beauty for me"
-John Knowles, A Separate Peace
How many times have I wanted to 'break out crying from stabs of hopeless joy"?! Certain music does it to me, the songs that can actually bring me back to a place were things were once 'OK'. I've been listening to a CD lately that arouses within me a mix of emotions ranging from longing, to hope, to fear, to inexpressible joy. But I am left still with this longing. The problem isn't resolved when I listen to the song I am just more aware of it when it is over.
Something inside me is breaking
Something inside says there's somewhere better than this...
There must be somewhere better than this. Things aren't the way they should be.
All I can do sometimes is cling to the hope that God is fixing the problem. Not only in my own life, where I would love to put things right, but in the whole world. Things will be OK. The music reminds me not only that I have this longing deep inside me for peace (Shalom) but that it doesn't have to end this way. The hope here is that there is more to the song. The score has been written and the notes have been arranged. Our task now is to figure out how to play it together.
-John Knowles, A Separate Peace
How many times have I wanted to 'break out crying from stabs of hopeless joy"?! Certain music does it to me, the songs that can actually bring me back to a place were things were once 'OK'. I've been listening to a CD lately that arouses within me a mix of emotions ranging from longing, to hope, to fear, to inexpressible joy. But I am left still with this longing. The problem isn't resolved when I listen to the song I am just more aware of it when it is over.
Something inside me is breaking
Something inside says there's somewhere better than this...
There must be somewhere better than this. Things aren't the way they should be.
All I can do sometimes is cling to the hope that God is fixing the problem. Not only in my own life, where I would love to put things right, but in the whole world. Things will be OK. The music reminds me not only that I have this longing deep inside me for peace (Shalom) but that it doesn't have to end this way. The hope here is that there is more to the song. The score has been written and the notes have been arranged. Our task now is to figure out how to play it together.
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
The Road Less Traveled
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-Robert Frost
I'm continuing on the theme of confusion and risk (as started over in Brimas' blog Thoughts in Multitude). What is risk? What is faith? Why is there so much confusion in my life?
Maybe we need to drop our ideas of normality. As long as we think there is a 'right' way to do things I think we bring ourselves much grief over things that don't fit into our little boxes. Usually if things don't fit into my boxes I do what I can to manipulate them so they will fit or I make the decision that whatever it was that didn't fit before had no business being in my box in the first place. So I drop the matter.
But that cannot be life. If I find myself in a situation that seems abnormal, or different, or harder than other people's situations, my first reaction is to think, "there is something wrong here." But what if my first reaction is, "Wow, this is different than I thought it would be"? Doesn't that allow for God to move much more and not have to fit into our notions of normality? Isn't that what most of the Bible is about?
So back to the poem. If taking the road less traveled is the point I think we are missing it. The point isn't to be different or make things harder for ourselves. But God's ways are not man's ways and I think we will find the road less traveled to be the way of God. It will make all the difference if we try that road. And there might be confusion, in fact there WILL be confusion. What is confusion other than a failure to fit something into a pre-existing box labeled "Life"? And maybe that is the difference. If confusion is an oppurtunity to rely on God then the road less traveled is the way into salvation and true life.
Small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it. Matthew 7:14
Things might be hard. But if life is our goal--true life--then it must be worth it. I hope we can do what it takes....
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-Robert Frost
I'm continuing on the theme of confusion and risk (as started over in Brimas' blog Thoughts in Multitude). What is risk? What is faith? Why is there so much confusion in my life?
Maybe we need to drop our ideas of normality. As long as we think there is a 'right' way to do things I think we bring ourselves much grief over things that don't fit into our little boxes. Usually if things don't fit into my boxes I do what I can to manipulate them so they will fit or I make the decision that whatever it was that didn't fit before had no business being in my box in the first place. So I drop the matter.
But that cannot be life. If I find myself in a situation that seems abnormal, or different, or harder than other people's situations, my first reaction is to think, "there is something wrong here." But what if my first reaction is, "Wow, this is different than I thought it would be"? Doesn't that allow for God to move much more and not have to fit into our notions of normality? Isn't that what most of the Bible is about?
So back to the poem. If taking the road less traveled is the point I think we are missing it. The point isn't to be different or make things harder for ourselves. But God's ways are not man's ways and I think we will find the road less traveled to be the way of God. It will make all the difference if we try that road. And there might be confusion, in fact there WILL be confusion. What is confusion other than a failure to fit something into a pre-existing box labeled "Life"? And maybe that is the difference. If confusion is an oppurtunity to rely on God then the road less traveled is the way into salvation and true life.
Small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it. Matthew 7:14
Things might be hard. But if life is our goal--true life--then it must be worth it. I hope we can do what it takes....
Monday, August 08, 2005
Super 8
I'm at a Super 8 motel in Bristol, Virginia. They have free wireless internet here. Unbelievable. I should be sleeping but I've been driving for 17 hours and I want to watch TV.
For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace.
--I Corinthians 14:33
I want that peace. But risk involves the unknown and it is the unknown that makes us confused. Working through the confusion must be God's way of teaching us to let go of ourselves and latch on to Him because after all is said and done, God is God and I am not. Confusion is an oppurtunity to trust God. Now, if I could just figure out what that means...
cause it's frightening to be
swimming in this strange sea
but i'd rather be here than on land
I would much rather be here, wrestling with God, than running away to a complacent life. I think it's worth it.
For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace.
--I Corinthians 14:33
I want that peace. But risk involves the unknown and it is the unknown that makes us confused. Working through the confusion must be God's way of teaching us to let go of ourselves and latch on to Him because after all is said and done, God is God and I am not. Confusion is an oppurtunity to trust God. Now, if I could just figure out what that means...
cause it's frightening to be
swimming in this strange sea
but i'd rather be here than on land
I would much rather be here, wrestling with God, than running away to a complacent life. I think it's worth it.
Sunday, August 07, 2005
Friends...
...Certain ones, very few, are our close friends. Because we have more in common with them, we are able to love them with a special selfless perfection, since we have more to share. They are inseparable from our own destiny, and, therefore, our love for them is especially holy: it is a manifestation of God in our lives. - Thomas Merton
There are those few who will always remain with us no matter where we are. Those are the ones who shape who we are and who we will become. Take the time to thank God for those few souls you are able to call friends.
If God made you, he's in love with me....
There are those few who will always remain with us no matter where we are. Those are the ones who shape who we are and who we will become. Take the time to thank God for those few souls you are able to call friends.
If God made you, he's in love with me....
Friday, August 05, 2005
Love, Pt. 2
I was reading over my last post and I realize that I don't finish thoughts very well. I will try to become better at it as I get used to blogging. Moving on....
1. Love God
2. Love Others
So I struggle with loving others which is really inseparable from loving God. I am selfish and it is hard for me to even imagine a life spent loving others as well as I love myself. That is my recap.
I need and want and desire things from people. Love, affection, attention, value, dignity, and encouragement would only be the start of the list. Am I alone in those desires? I need to either believe that those are my own problems or I can believe that those (and many more problems) are a part of the human condition that I share with all humanity. I think this makes a big difference in how we approach our own lives and the lives of others. If I think I'm alone in these needs I will either not open up to others because of shame or deliberately seek out fulfillment of these needs from others. I believe both of these are the wrong answer. The other option I have is to believe that all of us, every human being, lives in a fallen world and has a similar experience of life than me. This is not to say that we are all the same for God created us each uniquely, but we must recognize the similar situation we are all in. Creation, Fall, and Redemption. We all live and breath in that reality.
By believing that my problems and needs are not just my own but inherent to all who live in God's world, albeit fallen, I am able to recognize the inability for others to fulfill those needs for me. Along with that I must also recognize my inability to fulfill those same needs for others. What that should do for me is allow me to enter into my own struggles and pain in order to become a source of light and hope for others. Henri Nouwen would call this "the wounded healer." Think about it in terms of the word Compassion. Com = With, Passion = Suffering. Suffering with. So to have compassion is not to show pity, not to show kindness, not to simply love or care for, although those are all aspects of compassion. True compassion would be entering into your own sufferings in order to suffering along with others.
So loving myself should be recognizing the reality of my situation and living through it. Loving others should be recognizing not only the reality of my situation but the situation of all humanity. Only then can I cease to look to others for the fulfillment of my needs but I can move with others into God's love and compassion and recognize the source of life and fulfillment.
I need to believe this, though, and that is the hard part. To live this would mean a complete change of lifestyle that I may not be willing to take on.
More to come...
1. Love God
2. Love Others
So I struggle with loving others which is really inseparable from loving God. I am selfish and it is hard for me to even imagine a life spent loving others as well as I love myself. That is my recap.
I need and want and desire things from people. Love, affection, attention, value, dignity, and encouragement would only be the start of the list. Am I alone in those desires? I need to either believe that those are my own problems or I can believe that those (and many more problems) are a part of the human condition that I share with all humanity. I think this makes a big difference in how we approach our own lives and the lives of others. If I think I'm alone in these needs I will either not open up to others because of shame or deliberately seek out fulfillment of these needs from others. I believe both of these are the wrong answer. The other option I have is to believe that all of us, every human being, lives in a fallen world and has a similar experience of life than me. This is not to say that we are all the same for God created us each uniquely, but we must recognize the similar situation we are all in. Creation, Fall, and Redemption. We all live and breath in that reality.
By believing that my problems and needs are not just my own but inherent to all who live in God's world, albeit fallen, I am able to recognize the inability for others to fulfill those needs for me. Along with that I must also recognize my inability to fulfill those same needs for others. What that should do for me is allow me to enter into my own struggles and pain in order to become a source of light and hope for others. Henri Nouwen would call this "the wounded healer." Think about it in terms of the word Compassion. Com = With, Passion = Suffering. Suffering with. So to have compassion is not to show pity, not to show kindness, not to simply love or care for, although those are all aspects of compassion. True compassion would be entering into your own sufferings in order to suffering along with others.
So loving myself should be recognizing the reality of my situation and living through it. Loving others should be recognizing not only the reality of my situation but the situation of all humanity. Only then can I cease to look to others for the fulfillment of my needs but I can move with others into God's love and compassion and recognize the source of life and fulfillment.
I need to believe this, though, and that is the hard part. To live this would mean a complete change of lifestyle that I may not be willing to take on.
More to come...
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
Love
I have decided that I am selfish. I mean, i didn't just decide now, but it has become very clear to me over the last 24 years of my life that I am all about me. I want people to love me, I want people to notice me, I want people to take care of me, I want what is best for me.
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
Simplified:
1. Love God
2. Love Others
I'll do part 1 later but part 2 is where I see the struggle happening right now. Don't get me wrong, I don't think you can have number 2 without number 1 and perhaps even vice versa, but I'm going to focus on where I see the trouble spots are in part 2 and then move to the problems I'm having with number 1.
The problem, very simply put, is that I *don't* love others. I love myself and want what is best for me but do I really carry that out to my neighbor? Can you imagine yourself loving other people and wanting for them the same things you want for yourself? I have thought long and hard about this and I have realized that it would be HARD work to live like that. So I don't do it. When I meet someone, I want them to think well of me and like me. What if instead of wanting that for myself (and its not that bad of a thing to want, really) I decided to give that to other people? I think it would change the world.
So here I am, mildly depressed, thinking of how things could be and how I've messed so many great things in my life. The cure? I'm not really sure but I bet it involves 'dying to self'. I know that's so cliche so lets change it to: start caring about others before yourself. That makes it a little more of an active idea. How about we all try that for a few weeks and see how things are after that. What about just one day of that? I bet things are different.
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
Simplified:
1. Love God
2. Love Others
I'll do part 1 later but part 2 is where I see the struggle happening right now. Don't get me wrong, I don't think you can have number 2 without number 1 and perhaps even vice versa, but I'm going to focus on where I see the trouble spots are in part 2 and then move to the problems I'm having with number 1.
The problem, very simply put, is that I *don't* love others. I love myself and want what is best for me but do I really carry that out to my neighbor? Can you imagine yourself loving other people and wanting for them the same things you want for yourself? I have thought long and hard about this and I have realized that it would be HARD work to live like that. So I don't do it. When I meet someone, I want them to think well of me and like me. What if instead of wanting that for myself (and its not that bad of a thing to want, really) I decided to give that to other people? I think it would change the world.
So here I am, mildly depressed, thinking of how things could be and how I've messed so many great things in my life. The cure? I'm not really sure but I bet it involves 'dying to self'. I know that's so cliche so lets change it to: start caring about others before yourself. That makes it a little more of an active idea. How about we all try that for a few weeks and see how things are after that. What about just one day of that? I bet things are different.
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